Andy Rooney says, Value Women Who Are Over 40

Andy Rooney says,

As I grow in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

An older woman will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

If an older woman doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And it's usually something more interesting.

An older woman knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 40 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing.

An older woman can wear bright red lipstick during the day without looking like she just had an adventure inside a jam jar. This is not true of younger women (or drag queens).

Older women can run faster because they’re always wearing sensible shoes.

Older women are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

An older woman has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. An older woman couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.

An older woman will actually eat and enjoy food in front of you. Younger woman are too nervous to eat anything in front of somebody that they might possibly sleep with later.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to an older woman. They always know.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older woman is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

An older woman will never accuse you of stealing the best years of her youth because chances are someone else has stolen them first.

The older a woman gets, the stronger her libido gets; the older a man gets, the weaker his libido gets… Which is why nature intended young guys to go out with older women and young women to go out with older men.

Older women are experienced. They understand that sometimes, after 12 beers, a guy just can’t get it up. A younger woman may need some time to grasp this fact.

Older women know what kegel exercises are.

Yes, we praise older women for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.
ANDY ROONEY