"What a Kiss Means"

How to Kiss info website

LOCATION
*Kiss on the stomach-----"lets do it"
*Kiss on the Forehead ----"i hope we're together forever"
*Kiss on the Ear ---"I'm horny"
*Kiss on the Cheek ---"We're friends"
*Kiss on the Hand ---"I adore you"
*Kiss on the Neck ---"we belong together"
*Kiss on the Shoulder ---"I want you"
*Kiss on the Lips ---"I love you" OR "I want you"

What the gesture means...
*Holding Hands ---"we definitely love each other"
*Slap on the Butt ---"That's mine"
*Holding on tight ---"i don't want to let go"
*Looking into each other's Eyes ---"i just plain love you"
*Playing with Hair ---"Tell me you love me"
*Arms around the Waist ---"I love you too much to let go"
*Laughing while Kissing ---"I am completely Comfortable with you"

--Advice--
* Dont ask for a kiss, take one.
*If you were thinking about someone while reading this, you're definitely in Love.

If you LIKE, LOVE, OR MISS someone right now
and can't get them out of your head
then Re-post this within One Minute and Whoever you are missing will surprise you.
Repost this as "what a kiss means"

A man had just opened a restaurant but he couldn't think of a name.

So he decided to name it after the third person that walks in.

The third person walks in and the guy asked for her name.

She said "Jill."

"Well Jill, you have nice legs."

So the guy named the restaurant "Jill's Legs."

A week later a drunk was laying on the sidewalk outside the restaurant when a police officer asked him what he was doing.

He replied: "I'm waiting for Jill's Legs to open so I can get a bite to eat.

--
Bob - DelcoGuy

LOL was e-mailed to me so here it is ......

Now if this is real I do not know but here goes.............

Last year at Christmas time, my mom went to my sister's house for the
traditional holiday feast.

Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my
sister that she needed something from the store and asked if my sister wouldn't
mind going out to get it.
When my sister left the house, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed
the mixed stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey...
then re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back into the oven.

When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and
proceeded to remove the stuffing.

When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little
bird.

With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Barbara, you've
cooked a pregnant bird!"

At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry hysterically.

It took the entire family almost two hours to convince her that turkeys lay
eggs!

And, yes, my sister is a BLONDE

--
Bob - DelcoGuy

--
Bob - DelcoGuy

Mile High Club anyone?

ATLANTA (UPI) -- Those in Atlanta seeking to join the "Mile High Club" by having sex in an airborne aircraft can now do it for $299, but partners are not provided.

Corporate pilot Bob Smith says he and his business partner conceived the idea for a flying love nest five years ago as a weekend income supplement. His Mile High Atlanta service has now gone up 75 times for couples to get down, ABC News reports.

In the past only the very wealthy in private jets had the luxury, while the more common person had to make do with fumbling in tiny aircraft lavatories, said Gloria Brame, a clinical sex therapist in Atlanta.

"Having sex on airplanes has been around for almost as long as flights have existed," she told ABC News.

Smith said couples get a custom-fit bed, brand new sheets and a complimentary bottle of Champagne, and he pulls privacy curtains and dons headphones as a courtesy.

Smith told ABC he also provides couples with a kitchen timer to keep track of their hour and avoid being interrupted.

PRE-SCHOOL TEST

Pre-school children were asked the following question:

"In which direction is the school bus pictured below traveling?"

Look carefully at the picture.

Do you know the answer?

The only possible answers are "left" or "right."

Think about it

Still don't know?

Okay, I'll tell you.

The pre-schoolers all answered "left."

When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling in the left direction?"

they answered:

"Because you can't see the door."

Feel pretty dumb now, don't you?

I know, me too.

--
Bob - DelcoGuy

GOD BLESS AMERICA ! Hunting Season Opens Monday

=====================

The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500-man elite
fighting unit called the United States Redneck Special Forces. These
Alabama, Arkansas, Georgia, Kentucky, Mississippi, Missouri, Oklahoma, Tennessee, Texas, & West Virginia boys will be dropped into Iraq the first of next week They have been given only the following facts about terrorists:

1. The season opens on Monday.
2 There is no limit.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus.
5. They are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the death of Dale Earnhardt.

We expect the problem in Iraq to be over by Friday

--
Bob - DelcoGuy

New Boarding Regs we moving closer to

NOTICE TO BOARDING

PASSENGERS!

DUE TO INCREASED STATE OF SURVEILLANCE,

NOTHING WILL BE CARRIED ONTO THE AIRCRAFT!

EVERYTHING , CLOTHES, SHOES, CARRY-ONS, ELECTRONICS, JEWELRY, WATCHES, CAMERAS, GLASSES, LIQUIDS:

ALL ITEMS MUST BE CONTAINED IN CARGO LUGGAGE.

VIOLATORS WILL BE SUBJECT TO PROSECUTION.

YOUR COOPERATION IS APPRECIATED

Michael Chertoff

DIRECTOR

With all that is going on do you really feel safer? Wiser? What the founding fathers fought for, todays fathers are taking away from us.